Youth, Social, Contemporary, And general Questions

1. Youth: How Can You Act in a Christian Way?

2. Youth asking: What is the meaning of life?

3. Youth: Are we to socialise only with Christian people?

4. Youth: I have tried to talk to my non-Christian friends about God, but they never seem interested. What can I do?

5. Youth: How can I stop someone from having a relationship with a non-Christian?

6. Youth: What can I do for my parents who are not religious?

7. Youth:I am under so much pressure and I can’t stand it any more. What can I do?

8. Youth: What can I do when my parents drive me crazy?

9. Youth: Why should youth respect their parents?

10. Youth: Is it wrong to tell my friends the wrong I’ve done instead of a priest?

11. Youth: Sometimes I feel pressured to have a boyfriend. Is it okay to have a boyfriend if I don’t do anything wrong?

12. Youth: Is it wrong to have sexual desires?

13. Youth: Is adultery something that happens only after marriage?

14. Youth: What happens when a girl is raped, but she is not ready to have the child?

15. Youth: Is there anything wrong with going to parties?

16. Youth: What is wrong with smoking?

17. Youth: What is wrong with drinking alcohol?

18. Youth:Is there anything wrong with having different types of hairstyles, because, for example, in Leviticus 19:27, it says, “You shall not shave the sides of your head...”?

19. Youth: Why did Jesus have long hair if it says in the Bible men can't have long hair?

20. Youth: Is listening to today’s music wrong?

21. Youth:Is it wrong to sing non Coptic hymns in Church?

22. Youth: What happens when the emotional/psychological aspect of one’s personality dominates all other aspects of the personality?

23. Youth :What is your impression of the internet?

24. Youth:What  does the church think of abortion?

ANSWERS:

1. Youth: How Can You Act in a Christian Way?

   Bishop Moussa:
   1. Hold on to Your Christ:
   If you have neglected the life of fellowship you had during your secondary school education or in your small town, you must strive now several times harder in order to face up to the new circumstances.
   
   Prayer is the overflowing fountain in which you cleanse your heart and from which you slake your thirst. The chance of being alone in your chamber is the basic opportunity during which you breathe the gentle breeze of the Spirit. Your spirit will be filled only with Christ, so if you deprive it of Him, you will be torn by a morbid homesickness for your family or you will take a deviant path toward destructive friends or toward a person of the opposite sex.
   
   Prayer is a basic necessity in your life. It gives you great divine resources to face this age which has reverted to the worship of idols such as materialism, greed, and the pleasures of the flesh and in which human hearts have become devoid of the fear of God. People now race to accumulate wealth, to use power, cunning, dishonesty and bribery to reach eminent positions. They resort to lying to raise themselves and to injustice and tyranny in order to rule over others.
   
   These have all become normal and desirable matters for the children of this world.
   
   + Embrace your Bible, dear reader, and hide its words in your heart; only then can you avoid sinning against God.
   + Hold on to your Christ, my friend, for He is your best friend and companion in your days as an alien on earth, the best father for your life, and the best    physician for your circumstances.
   + Organize your prayers according to a system, and persevere in carrying it out with faithfulness under the guidance of your father confessor.
   + Read spiritual books regularly so that they may stimulate within you a conservative, loving and worshipful spirit.
   
   2. Define Your Personality Traits:
   You may feel, dear reader, that your behavior in the Way of the Kingdom makes other accuse you of backwardness and deficiency. Be sure, my friend, that unless you live your Christianity in depth and define your personality traits clearly, the people of the world will intimidate you with their criticism, and you will imagine that you are wrong and they are right. The well-defined Christian youth has a strong personality and definite characteristics. He does not feel inferior because he does not sin, and he does not feel deprived because he avoids the prevalent pleasures of this age. On the contrary, he feels that he is a son of God and that he follows what is right.
   
   The Christian youth is not ashamed of the Way of the Kingdom and does not take part in the works of darkness. He deals with the society in which he lives with love; he preserves his eternal inheritance, loves those who surround him, prays for them, and invites them to follow the way of purity. He pulls them out of the fire with great caution so that he may not be involved himself in what is not fitting for him. The well-defined youth who is not passive is always strong, always victorious. The youth who is internally defeated and who feels that religion has deprived him of being normal like those around him is a coward, hesitant, and prepared to flee in situations that call for witnessing.
   You will see around you young persons who enter into relationships with the opposite sex. If you are convinced of the soundness of your walk with Christ, you will face these situations without experiencing any attraction, without pride or arrogance, and without feeling deprived or lacking in some way. You have come to university to acquire knowledge, so postpone the issue of marriage to a more suitable time.
   
   Be filled with the mind of the Kingdom, with the Lord of the Kingdom, and with the children of the Kingdom, so that you may live as king over your self and your weaknesses, and over conflicts with people and with the times.
   
   3. Maintain Your Relationship with Your Father Confessor:
   You will make many mistakes, my brother, if you do not maintain your relationship with a father confessor, even in the place where you are a stranger if you come from another town. This is the beginning of withdrawal from the way of the Kingdom. Regular confessions are important stations that occur at close intervals during which you re-examine yourself and ascertain your progress.
   
   Make haste, my brother, in choosing a father confessor and keep in touch with him continually so that you obtain the help of the Holy Spirit in the personal, social, spiritual and academic circumstances of your life. You will find that you get sound advice and sincere help from your spiritual father.
   
   4. Beware of Ceasing to Serve:
   It is evident that the circumstances of the new university life cause some kind of confusion and preoccupation initially because of the change in lifestyle, in living quarters, in food, and in studies. Hence, you may neglect your work in one of the fields of service. This is a grave danger, for the spirit of service will grow cold in time and you will be lost in the vortex of those who are lost.
   
   Join the nearest branch of Church education quickly, for service is an important weapon in your fight with the enemy and with yourself. It satisfies your soul with the richness of the word and of prayer, and keeps you in a holy, spiritual and social atmosphere that makes up for the circle of family and friends in your small town if you are a stranger.
   
   5. Social Activities:
   It is good to deal with everybody with love, but you should also do so with discrimination. How many corrupt friendships have destroyed the lives of many!
   
   Be active in your social life, but under the supervision of your conscience and of your father confessor.
   Do not participate in activities you know will harm your life, and do not ignore the inner voice of the Spirit of God Who warns you against them.
   
   6. Study Regularly and Seriously:
   The freedom of university life often turns into confusion. That is why the mature young person should plan his time seriously and firmly.
   
   Give everything its due: spiritual life and the church, studying and rest.
   Value the painful sacrifices your family is making in order to support you, and value the opportunity to witness to Christ through your success and progress.
   
   The university student who makes the freedom of university the occasion of negligence, of emotional involvement, and of academic failure does not deserve his father’s sweat or his mother’s tears.
   
   And now, beloved friend, I leave you to spend some time in your chamber in prayer during which you renew your promises and define the milestones of the way, and may the Lord be with you.
    

2. Youth asking: What is the meaning of life?

   Bishop Moussa Answer:
   Life is to enjoy the love of the Lord, and to convey the love of the Lord to others through service, and to prepare yourself for eternity where you will live with the Lord forever.

    

3. Youth: Are we to socialise only with Christian people?
   Bishop Moussa Answer:: spiritual love must be given to all people, and not be restricted to just Christians. There is a big difference between friends and acquaintances. Your friends should be Christian, to help you build your spiritual life, but you can have many acquaintances in society - at school, at university, at work, and so on. When I say “socialise with them”, I mean be on good terms with them, have pure Christian love for them, caring and sharing with them. If they are sick you must visit them, if a family member or friend has passed away, you must go and pay your condolences, if they are celebrating a feast, such as Ramadan, you must give them your best wishes. Therefore, you must have pure Christian love towards them, but do not have an intimate relationship with them because they differ in their thoughts, their principles, their ideas, their philosophies and their practices. Have friends from within the church, and have as many acquaintances as you like in society. Express your Christian love to them; go with them when it is right, and withdraw from them when they do wrong.
    

4. Youth: I have tried to talk to my non-Christian friends about God, but they never seem interested. What can I do?

   HGBishop Moussa Answer :
   It is better to talk to them through your example and not through words. If you are holy, and you pray for them, and you genuinely like them and care for them, a time will come for talking to them. But first you must start by being a good example, and then the Lord will open the door for them, on a certain day and in a certain way.

    

5. Youth: How can I stop someone from having a relationship with a non-Christian?

   HG : Pray for them, and try to convince them that through what they are doing, they will lose Christ. Also ask your priest to support you in this task, and give him the details of the matter.

    

6. Youth: What can I do for my parents who are not religious?

   HG : Pray for them, love them, be a good example in front of them, invite them to the church, and ask your priest to help you in this matter.

   
   7. Youth: I am under so much pressure and I can’t stand it any more. What can I do?

   HG : Certainly, we have pressure coming from the outside - through the instincts, from the world and from Satan. But why do you forget that through the Holy Spirit, and divine grace, and the Lord residing in you, that you can overcome this stress that you are feeling? The power which surrounds us in the world is limited and the power of God is unlimited. The problem occurs when we are not regular in taking this spiritual power from God. It is then we feel weak. If you, being finite, come into contact with the Infinite, who is God, you will feel strong and victorious over these pressures around you.

    

   8. Youth: What can I do when my parents drive me crazy?

   HG : It is important first to look at yourself. Are you egocentric and unwilling to let your parents share in your life? This is surely not correct because you are in need of your parents' advice and guidance, and you cannot rely on your own wisdom. These days we may feel that we know everything, but we must consider that there are four areas of growth and maturity in a human being's life: physical growth, psychological growth, mental growth and spiritual growth. During the teenage years, physical growth is sudden, but the other areas mature gradually. So do not forget or neglect that there is a gap in maturity during the teen years. This gap is to be filled with guidance from God and the Holy Scriptures, the guidance of your spiritual father, and the guidance of your parents at home.
   
      Sometimes their ways can be annoying and they may seem over-protective, but you must bear in mind the motive behind their actions, which is love and caring.
   
      Therefore you must feel this need for communicating with them and be convinced that at present you are not yet mature in all four areas. Even in sexual life there are two main areas of growth: the physical and the psychological. Again the physical is sudden, but the psychological is gradual - during your teenage years you are in a stage called “general hetero-sexuality” which means you are looking at the opposite sex in general. Today you may like someone, but tomorrow you may not. This is not because you are bad, but this is the life, the science, and the psychology of this age group. After your teen years, you come to another stage called “selective heterosexuality”, and it is at this stage that you are now ready to choose your partner in life. In addition, during your teenage years, you are not yet ready mentally, or spiritually, for at this age you will not have the concept of asking for God's guidance in examining the spiritual life of both yourself and your partner. Therefore in order to select the right partner in life, it is necessary that you recognize these four areas of growth
    

   9. Youth: Why should youth respect their parents?

   HG : Young people must respect their parents because:
   1- Your parents love you more than you love yourself.
   2- They have more experience than you.
   3- They respect your personality, desires, thinking, and decisions, but out of love they want to participate with you in your life so that decisions made can be the result of team discussion, rather than being taken individually. If you make decisions individually, you are going to commit many mistakes, so you need their guidance. Bear in mind also that although your physical growth is sudden, your mental growth and your spiritual growth are gradual. So, you need the guidance and wisdom of your parents. Please take their blessings. This is a commandment of the Bible.
    

   10. Youth: Is it wrong to tell my friends the wrong I’ve done instead of a priest?

   HG : Your friend may have different views from yours, and so may mislead you in his advice. A priest, however, who has wisdom and experience will never mislead you. Also, how can you guarantee that the friend you have today will still be your friend tomorrow, and will keep what you have said secret? Therefore please do not rush to tell secrets to your friends. A priest, however, will always respect your confidentiality. And finally, only the priest can give you absolution for your sins, not your friend.
   
    

   11. Youth: Sometimes I feel pressured to have a boyfriend. Is it okay to have a boyfriend if I don’t do anything wrong?

   HG : As His Holiness Pope Shenouda says, “Have many boyfriends and many girlfriends”, but if you pair off, you may start out chaste and holy, but who can guarantee what may happen? Can you guarantee yourself, or your partner, or Satan? Each day we pray, “Lead us not into temptation...” (Matt. 6:13), but by having a boyfriend or
   a girlfriend we are leading ourselves into temptation. Let your relations be in groups from within the church until the time comes for you to select your partner for marriage.
    

   12. Youth: Is it wrong to have sexual desires?

   HG : Desires are natural and normal and if we didn’t have them we would be abnormal. The desire itself is not wrong, but it can be the start of a wrong thing: “...when desire has conceived, it gives birth to sin; and sin, when it is fully grown brings forth death” (James 1:15).
   Therefore, when desire starts you must control yourself not to sin, and try rather to have spiritual desires in order to help you maintain control
    

   13. Youth: Is adultery something that happens only after marriage?

   HG: Sex before and after marriage is adultery. Sex inside of marriage is the right and pure thing; it is the only sex that can be a fruit of love and a way for love. It will increase the love between the two partners, and it will lead them to more spiritual love; because the Lord is the third person living with them and unifying them: man, woman, Jesus Christ - this is a true Christian marriage. If there is no Jesus Christ, it will just be a man-woman human relation, and it can be broken at any time. So have the Lord inside your life, inside your heart, inside your home, and you will definitely have a very happy married life.
    

   14. Youth: What happens when a girl is raped, but she is not ready to have the child?

   HG : She can let someone adopt the child, for we, as, do not accept abortion because abortion means depriving the child of life and it is not in our capacity to do this; it is the embryo’s right to live. And as for our precious Christian girls, surely they would not put themselves in such a situation that leads to this bitter experience. So take care, and be cautious. This does not mean that you must be always suspicious, but you must be as simple as the dove, and as wise as the serpent.
    

   15. Youth: Is there anything wrong with going to parties?

   HG : It is up to you to decide this and to consider what occurs in parties. Is the party going to be held in a Christian atmosphere, or are you going to lose your spiritual blessings by attending? We do not want you to live in isolation; we want you to be happy, but you must select the party that will not hurt you spiritually.
    

   16. Youth: What is wrong with smoking?

   HG : The young people are usually persuaded by their friends to start smoking, but out of deep and genuine love to everybody, please don’t start smoking, and if you do smoke, please give it up. Because a time will come when you regretit , but after destroying your health. Sometimes young people take things lightly, but this is not the right way to deal with anything in life. We must deal with things seriously. Life is not fun only; fun is only one aspect of life. Please do not consider smoking as fun, because it will destroy you. You will lose your spiritual blessings because you won’t have the power to fast; you will lose your will; you will lose your money; and you will lose your health.
    

   17. Youth: What is wrong with drinking alcohol?

   HG : Drinking alcohol leads to liver failure. It destroys the health, one’s personality, one’s social relations,  and family relations. Do not deceive yourselves into believing that you can control yourselves, for even if you might control yourself at  normal times, in times of stress and depression, you will turn to alcohol, and this habit will result in addiction

    

   18. Youth: Is there anything wrong with having different types of hairstyles, because, for example, in Leviticus 19:27, it says, “You shall not shave the sides of your head...”?

   HG : The problem is not with the hairstyle, but with the essence of the person inside. When you cut your hair, what are you thinking about? Who are you trying to imitate? If you want to be different or distinguished, be different in your personality, your success, your achievements. The way you look; your hairstyle and your clothes, reveal how you think, and what you think about. The church cares about cutting the sins from your heart and mind rather than the hairs of your head
    

   19.Youth: Why did Jesus have long hair if it says in the Bible men can't have long hair?

   Bishop Moussa Answer: Because Jesus was anointed, dedicated and consecrated to the Lord. Even some of the monks today, who are consecrated, do not cut their hair.
   
    

   20. Youth: s listening to today’s music wrong?

   Bishop Moussa Answer:
   Today’s music speaks to the emotions, and to the body, and instincts; it excites the emotions and hence the body. In addition, the majority of today’s songs are filled with many negative, anti-Christian messages, so it is better to listen to music that will raise your heart towards heaven and the Lord.
   
    

   21.Youth: Is it wrong to sing non Coptic hymns in Church?

   Bishop Moussa Answer:
   No, but there is something we need to be able to differentiate between: are these hymns lifting you spiritually or emotionally? Emotional music speaks to and excites the body, and so therefore, we must sing hymns which uplift us spiritually.

    

   22. Youth: What happens when the emotional/psychological aspect of one’s personality dominates all other aspects of the personality?

   Bishop Moussa Answer:
   It is important to nourish and have a balance between all aspects of the personality, by having a spiritual father who can advise you concerning practicing some spiritual exercises, such as Bible readings, and attending spiritual meetings, and so on. It is also important to maintain a spiritual routine, and abide in a spiritual atmosphere

    

   23.Youth : What is your impression of the internet?
   Bishop Moussa Answer:
   The concept of the internet is good; however, information contained on the internet is not always good. St. Paul, in his first epistle to the Thessalonians (5:20) says, “Test all things, hold fast to what is good”. You must take care concerning the internet, lest you:
   
   1- Become addicted to the net.
   2- Surf inappropriate sites.
   3- Participate in chat rooms.
   4- Waste your time.
   5- Fail to have good social relations through spending so much time and energy on the net.
   6- Develop eye and posture prob-lems from sitting in front of the PC for long periods of time. When surfing the net, be selective in choosing the good, and neglect the bad and harmful.
    

   24. Youth: What does the church think of abortion?

   Bishop Moussa Answer:
   As Christians, we are pro-life, for it is the right of the embryo to live, except for medical reasons, or when the life of the mother is at risk.