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How can I understand celibacy? |
Is it a the condition of not being married? Yes,
celibacy in general is not marrying, for the celibate
person does not get married. However, that is not all.
A bachelor does not get married either, but there is a
great and basic difference between the bachelor and
the celibate.
Let us review the words of our Lord Jesus Christ, to
Him be glory, when he taught about celibacy after he
had discussed marriage and divorce. “His disciples
said to him: ‘If such is the case of the man with his
wife, it is better not to marry.’ But He said to them,
‘All cannot accept this saying, but only those to whom
it has been given. For there are eunuchs who were born
thus from their mother’s womb, and there are eunuchs
who were made eunuchs by men, and there are eunuchs
who have made themselves eunuchs for the kingdom of
heaven’s sake. He who is able to accept it, let him
accept it!’” (Mt. 18: 10 - 12).
Thus, the celibate person is the one who made himself
a eunuch for the kingdom of heaven’s sake
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Can everyone accept these words? |
Our Lord Jesus Christ, to Him be glory, said: “but
only those to whom it has been given..... He who is
able to accept it, let him accept it.”
We wonder why He did not say this when He taught about
prayer, or charity, or fasting, or when He completed
the law of the Old Testament. The answer is clear;
everyone has to accept these virtues and pursue them
as they are necessary and useful for their salvation.
But as for those who have made themselves eunuchs for
the sake of the kingdom of heaven, not everyone is
able to do it, but only those to whom it is given.
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Celibacy is a Gift of God |
Those who think that it is merely a struggle on the
part of the individual are wrong, no matter how holy
that struggle is.
Otherwise our Lord would not have said: “but only
to whom it has been given .. and he who is able to
accept it, let him accept it.”
Therefore, it is a gift granted by God to individuals
whose hearts He has examined, whose ardent love that
pervades their life He knows.
They have made eunuchs of themselves for the sake of
the kingdom of heaven. This reveals the extent and
greatness of their surpassing love.
The celibate offers his life as a holy sacrifice, a
sacrifice of love, on the altar of celibacy. It is
true that everybody is invited to the kingdom, and
everyone longs for the kingdom, and all are members in
the body of Christ, but the soul of the celibate is a
special bride of Christ’s.
The soul of the celibate has gone out after its Lord
and is attached to Him. It lays all its life wholly in
the hands of its Lord, and so Jesus Christ becomes its
groom.
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The Real Bridegroom of the Soul |
Celibacy, as well as being a gift granted by God, is
also a holy marriage, a strong and holy bond with
Christ Who sanctifies all the bonds of marriage.
This holy marriage is totally confirmed, first of all,
by the element of love which gives determination and
purpose. It is this love that gives all future
striving meaning and value; it grants to those to whom
it is given a pure will that does not rebel. It gives
them a strong faith and great boldness that make them
turn their back on the whole world with all its
pleasures to desire Christ and to be enlightened by
His love.
The celibate, who has fixed his eyes, his emotions,
and his will as a special bride on the Beloved,
devotes his life for the sake of Christ Himself. He
does not consecrate it to any work or service however
great, but, as the Lord says, for the sake of the
kingdom of heaven.
This holy objective gives the service of the
consecrated celibate the power of witnessing. St. Paul
the Apostle was a celibate and served and ministered
as the greatest minister in Christianity. Fiery
Elijah, who was celibate, carried out the greatest of
tasks; the secret of his power was that he fixed his
eyes on the God of his holy fathers and was jealous
with the jealousy of the Lord.
The soul of the celibate, which has become the bride
of Christ, can confirm and witness to the surpassing
beauty of Christ. It abandons everything to follow
Him; its thought is free of all sense of the world. It
separates itself from the world to unite with the Only
One; it abandons many to unite with the One Who is
fairer than the sons of men.
How beautiful are the words of one of the celibates:
O sweet and greatly beloved Jesus, grant that I may
rest in You.
Above every creature
Above every health and beauty
Above every glory and honor
Above every wealth and prosperity
Above every knowledge and intelligence
Above every fortune and art
Above every happiness and joy
Above every sweetness and comfort
Above every promise and hope
Above every deserving and desire
Above all You give as gifts and talents
Above every happiness and joy; for my heart cannot
really rest or walk well unless it rests in You,
rising above every gift and every creation.
Lord Jesus Christ, my greatly beloved bridegroom, O
great and pure love, the Master of all creation, grant
me the wings of real freedom so that I might fly and
rest in You.
Let others ask for whatever seems good to them other
than You, but as for me, nothing is or will be good to
me except You alone.
You are my God, my hope, my eternal salvation.
Celibacy is a gift, a holy marriage, and a bond of
pure love; in it, the celibate soul sings a hymn of
praise saying: “I am my beloved’s; and my beloved is
mine.”(Song6:3).
Just as the bride leaves her home, her family, and her
people to belong to the man who has become her head,
all her love, and all her people, so does the soul do
the same, if not more. The celibate soul becomes a
special bride of Christ’s, leaving all its interests
and business to walk in the way and in the light of
its Bridegroom. It knows the paths of its Lord and His
footsteps as He climbs the mountain of Golgotha.So it
follows Him fearlessly and without hesitation. It
drinks with Him the cup with delight and tastes
suffering with Him happily. In spite of this, it is
drunk with love and rejoices with hope. When it
contemplates the glory that awaits it in the Beloved,
its suffering is made lighter. Its whole being is
emptied of the love of the world with all its beauties
and pleasures because it has become the bride of the
Victorious One Who has victory over the world, the
Lord Jesus Christ, the real Bridegroom.
This holy marriage and living bond is completely
apprehended by a mind that is open and aware of its
nature. That is why the celibate individual does not
despise or look down on marriage, for he did not
become celibate in an attempt to escape marriage.
His life overflows with love and sweetness; he has all
the potential to live a married life. Therefore, his
attitude to marriage is a holy and humble one.
However, he follows the teachings of St. Paul the
Apostle when he said: “But I want you to be without
care. He who is unmarried cares for the things that
belong to the Lord -- how he may please the Lord. But
he who is married cares about the things of the world
-- how he may please his wife. There is a difference
between a wife and a virgin. The unmarried woman cares
about both the things of the Lord, that she may be
holy both in body and in spirit. But he who is married
cares about the things of the world -- how she may
please her husband.” (1 Cor. 7: 32 -34).
Marriage has its duties and responsibilities, and in
the face of this demanding love, the love of the
husband or wife is divided.
For the sake of the undivided heart and of the
surpassing love that fills the heart of the celibate,
he consecrates his celibacy to Christ so that Christ
may become all his preoccupation and all his love, and
that he might become wholly, body, soul, and spirit, a
temple of the Lord and a holy dwelling place for Him.
When he offers all his life a sacrifice of love, he
cannot boast or feel that he has done anything greater
than the married person. This is for the simple reason
that he is aware of the truth, which is that celibacy
is a grace and a free gift from above. If the celibate
makes the error of boasting, he falls from this lofty
love and distorts the beauty of celibacy.
Christ continues to bless the Sacrament of marriage; a
sanctified marriage does not prevent a person from
fellowship with God and from reaching the highest
levels of worship.
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